Friday, October 30, 2009

c0okie Jar





Title : Plant design presentation
Presenter : Members
Mood : Okay
Music : mix






just me :

rAy jR...@...Aliff

Thursday, October 29, 2009

you die I die...

Title : Just me
m00d : ntahlah...serabut..(sbb baby hati luv xmsg kot..haha)
Music : Cycl0ne (feat.T-Pain)
Compliment : Pujian utk ch0tz sbb buatkan "Link card" aku kt bl0g dia. Appreciated


Description :

We (aku & honey) had a c0ntact recently. (kind of giving me h0pe)..but in the end of the c0nversation, she just make me sUcks myself again. well, whatever. As she said 2 me by d end of d c0nversation :

H0ney : I d0nt b0ther anym0re...(end of the c0nversation)

(it's just a few messages. She never dare to pick up the ph0ne when i called her. Maybe she have her own reason...and i should understand that)


Ikutlah. I d0 care ab0ut her every single day. but I'm a human as well, n0t an animal to be treated like that. or maybe, i just deserved that...(please forgive me God for I am a sinner)..Anyway, entry ni bkn utk mgaibkan siapa2, tpi sbgai teladan buat aku...

I think she remember this one:

(In Along's house)~*Along is the money lender

Aku : Sir, could you please lend me s0me money..I urgently need it
Along : Owh...what kind of emergency is that?...
Aku : Emm...its me..I need it to settle s0me important things..(actually its f0r h0ney)
Along : Alright then..if u say so..then h0w much do u want?
Aku : About rm2500.00
Along : Sure no problem..but u have to remember, I give you 2 months to pay all of it..
Aku : Thank you sir..is there any charge?
Along : Naahh..d0nt worry..you're a friend of mine...And I like you..
Aku : huh?...emm...Thanks again sir...(Mampus r pe dia nk ckp masa tu..yg pntg i got d money)

(With h0ney)..

Aku : hon, i know u need this money to pay f0r the things u need to pay
Honey : hah??...where u get this money..?..what did u do..?
Aku : Its okay hon..as long as ur problem settle, then i'll be happy too
Honey : emmm....okay then...

(actually honey men0lak jugak..but I insist..Well, when u l0ve s0meone, u'll d0 anything)


(Months later)..

Along : Hell0 there my fren..so what's d story...my money pe citer?
Aku : Yes sir..could u plz hold on for another more month?...just gimme a little bit more time plz
Along : Ni ape kes ni?...U ckp nk bayar as soon as possible...I dh tunggu lama dh ni..
Aku : I know...tapi I dont have d money n0w...
Along : Oh no...no more time f0r you...Unless you could do something 4 me 2 pay back what u owed me..******
Aku : huh??....I'm sorry sir..I dont do that job..u just h0ld on and i'll get your money ASAP..
Along : Ini kes tipu nie.....Then i'll see u in court..

(its a damned torturing pressure...Haraaamm...then aku kol Honey at that time so that I could calm myself d0wn..)

Aku : eLO hon...(then aku tell her everything...atleast aku rasa relief sket)
Honey : huh...so..?...last time i asked u where u get the money fr0m..but u nver tell me..so now it's non of my business...
Aku : I dont asked anything fr0m u hon...just gimme a little bit support..back me up..that's all i need
Honey : huh...Whatever..(sambil buat muka..)
Aku : Tapi klw kes ni masuk court..?...then aku masuk jail mcamana..?
Honey : emm..then klw mcm tu, hujung2 mggu aku ada masa, aku dtg lawat ko r..
Aku : speechless....sayu hatiku.....;(..

(Betapa aku ini insan yg hina..betapa aku ini insan yg lemah..Forgive me for I am a sinner...After all yg aku buat utk dia, that's what she said 2 me..koyak-rabak hati aku...pikir la sndri klw korg kt tmpat aku masa tu..)


In the end...My parents settle all of it through legal admin..fr0m rm2500, d amount increased to rm*****...That, after I got "something" fr0m my dad....but I never tell them what is the money f0r...never..(coz, I am a human..and i have feelings)..



*p/s :This happened centuries ag0..n0w h0ney have her successful j0b and I have my 0wn contract j0b as well..So no more hutang2..
*p/s : Pengajaran..jgn berhutang..c0z its really 'pain in d ass'..dont dare to try.
*p/s : -just me-...Aku halalkan semua itu..i'm letting u go n0w..take care k





just me :

rAy jR...@..ALiff

Monday, October 26, 2009

C0nfession oF a br0ken-hearted

Title : Bedtime st0ry
Emoti0n : Stabil & happy
Music : Akon ft o'donis (What you got)

St0ry tale :

This is a confession of a br0ken hearted who has already found a purpose in his life. Bersahaja aku ingin bercerita disaat aku keb0sanan sambil melayan r0kok murah berjenama 'League' dan dibuai lagu2 club yang indah..

5 months ag0...(babak dalam kereta waja)

*Aku: hon, please dont do this to me..Why u keep on ignoring me
*H0ney: huh..come on, let me go and do whatever u wanna do with ur life
*Aku: please hon..I beg u..Look at me!..can't u c that I'm suffer right n0w..Please hon..Why u suddenly become like this..Because of dat guy yg u baru knal for few months, u dumped me and u make me hurt so much..how could u do dis to me..

(sambil air mata mencurah2 di pipi yang kini telah kehilangan lemaknya disebabkan terlalu berduka..)

*Honey: Whatever

(matanya langsung xmemandang aku...sambil tersenyum sinis menganggap aku terlalu murah & hina)

*Aku: Tolong la..utk kali ni je..I beg for ur apology for whatever i've done..Jangan buat mcm ni hon..we have share lots of memory together..Please honey..Just pretend that u still love me..please, just for few more months..please..

(aku yg hina ni masih lgi menangis2 mcm kanak2 pmpuan yg kehilangan anak patungnya)

*Honey: No, we dont share lots of memory together..stop crying..it's annoying..Okay, i will be with u for few more months..I promise..and I still love u..

Byk lagi perbualan masa tu tapi malas aku nk describe lebih2...Masa tu aku bsyukur sgt2 sbb aku diberi peluang kedua...Air muka mula berseri2 mnampakkan yg aku kembali bahagia....


few days later (babak dlm telefon bimbit)

*Aku: hon, kt mana? bukan nk balik kL ke ari ni?
*Honey: emm...yup
*Aku: wat time gerak? wit who?
*Honey: mlm..xyah tanya la ngn sapa..u dont have to knw
*Aku: ok then..i'll drive for u k..lagipun xkan nk drive sorg mlm2 buta..
*Honey: no need la...i can take care of myself
*Aku: its okay..I just drive for u and then when we reach kL i'll take d bus and go straight back to ktn..
*Honey: I say no need no need la..cant you understand!!(nada suara yg tinggi)
*Aku: Napa ni hon, I did somethig wrong?..please dont act like this...I just wanna make sure u're okay...After we reach kL u dont have to care bout me anymore..I will just take d bus and come back here..
*Honey: ok, mcm ni la...aku pg kL ngn ******..He will drive for me..u dont have to care..mind ur own business...
*Aku: but u promise me that u will still be with me and come back to what we r b4..
*Honey: ok look..aku ckp mcm tu sebab aku kesiankn ko..aku xpnah maksudkan apa yg aku ckp masa tu....
*Aku: what..!...??......kaku...tergamam.....

~air mata mula meleleh dipipi utk kali kedua, kali ni diikuti ngn hati yg cukup sebak..hanya Tuhan shja yg tahu peraaanku masa tu..Ya Rabbii...aku bagaikan hilang arah..sanggup dia mempermainkan aku setelah aku buat mcm2 utk dia..Aku igtkan dia ikhlas dengan kata2 nya...sanggup dia tipu aku semata2 kerana dat one guy yg dia baru kenal yg mmg xbplejaran, muka xde pakej & cuma pandai bermain dengan kata2 manis ala2 bahasa terengganunya..

*Honey: Dia lagi mulia dari ko..aku selesa bila bersama dengannya....

~tutttttttt......she hang up d ph0ne....aku ph0ne berkali2 tpi no answer...almost 100 times tpi still no answer..tonnes of messages aku hntar..still no answer...Masa tu la aku btul2 hilang akal mcm lakhnat...siap beli panadol 50 biji...mnangis2 mcm haram..mber2 aku dtg bilik and cool me d0wn...the situation goes for almost 7 months already n0w and eventhough aku masih teringat2 dia, tapi aku perlu hntikan smua 2...its crap....she had a better life n0w..she's happy and that's wat I want right..?...

~There's a lot of stories before that thing happened....byk kontroversi...etc2...tapi malas aku nk cerita lebih2...FaRRkkkk all of that..I do not bother anymore..its been so long already and I almost forgot about u..dats wat u want right..so be it...

~What I wanna say here is that, sometimes people change easily when they met someone new and make them smile...they forgot that, there's some0ne who always care about them every single day...susah@senang.always together with them...and its not new...and from this occasion, I've learned a lot of things...Its the value of life...Just dont give too much hope on relationship..dont give evertg to it..keep some of it to urself..so that, when this thing comes 2 u, u still can survive and value ur life...


*p/s: dont worry, aku xemo pun msa posting entry ni..just wanna share..malu??..naahh...go to hell with malu...its the experiences & value that I wanna share..right now, aku bersyukur dengan life aku...I'm happy...Thanks to d person who give me hope..and chill me up.....

*p/s: lets enjoy in d club baby...lalallalaa....


just me:

rAy jR...@..Aliff

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Entry tuk k0 Lappy@baby



Title : Entry khas tuk Lappy @ baby
Photographer : rAy jR...@...Aliff
Purpose : em0e


Sh0rt & em0e :

- You always be around when I need u
- I took a very good care of u with all my l0ve
- But suddenly you make me losing my mind today
- In times I really need you
- You ignored me
- You leaved me without a warning
- Now I really misses you
- Coz you keep lots of my memories in you
- Please d0nt leave me baby coz I really need you
- Now I know dat I am so into you baby
- Aku collect all d fl0wers especially for you....



"This one step
choosing a goal
&
staying to it
changes everything."

- Scott Reed-



*p/s ~ Lappy @ baby is my laptop..(n0w the black screen turns to green)..oh dear, i d0nt even n0w what c0lor am I using n0w..
*p/s ~ And baby, dis is dedicated especially for you..




just me :

rAy jR...@...Aliff

Baby..



Title : Luv & Baby..?..
Photographer : rAy jR....@....Aliff



Shall I compare thee to a summer's day
Thou art more lovely and more temperate
Rough win do shakes the darling buds of may
and summer's least hath all to short a date
-shakespeare-



~I speak on the truth and for the truth I hold on to..You have my words...The proposal & the declaration?....Accepted!!~ (*that's what he said to his baby).



*p/s ~ I didn't copy d poems..it always plays around my head since I was in my form 4..long ag0..thanks to my english teacher...



just me :

rAy jR....@....aliff

Friday, October 23, 2009

Walk away..



Event : Site Visit
Location : Halliburton Kemaman & Gas Malaysia KL
Participants : Gas Department

Description :

Woke up around 5am in d morning, and then went back 2 sleep for few minutes...and up again at 6am..Been a tough day today..Anyway, I dont mind to go anywhere for whatever job..But i seriously hate it to pass through Gebeng industrial area..It reminds me of some memories there..

Still remember d previous entry when I talked about how I walk through d rain and waited at d bus-stop from 5pm-11pm with all d wet clothes and pale skins?..yes, dats d place...Look how I willing to do anything for certain people..But people never understand...

I tried to close my eyes when I passed by d area..But I couldn't..The heart beating so fast that I suddenly look through d window and there it was...The bus stop and I saw a beautiful white sn0wy car parked in front of a pink color house that I hate so much...but at d same time missing it so badly and I could not afford to lose it no matter how cruel it is to run away from me...


just me :

rAy jR...@...Aliff

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Entry Separa LucAh..


Title : H0t dAy
Location : 0n eArth
sTar : budAk Nakal

Description :

Today was a very h0t day..I have to woke-up early in d m0rning at 8am eventhough I started to sleep at 5.30am..As the master of cerem0ny for the CEO's special talk, I have t0 prepare myself as early as 9am..

I didn't wear a proper attire dis m0rning since I thought d cerem0ny would be very informal and slumber...Unfortunately, I was wr0ng..Its a self humiliating..Jeans & sleeve..?.Not a g0od example..Well, whetever...atleast I g0t a free lunch with the Managing director & the Dean..ehem..(industry's big fish my man)..

And by d way, I just got an unofficial offer fr0m Dr Rafiziana (gas explosion expert) to bec0me her contract research officer (RO)..?..I think...?..emm...I think I would consider on that since she's doing her research on gas explosion and I am so into it...Eventhough I'm currently working as a contract research assistant (RA) for the biotech project..Kinda busy huh?..

So whatever..As long as I did my j0b and as long as my thesis can be d0ne as early as possible, I'm on it..I dare to take the challenges..I just applied to get into Shell and Technip, and they're in the progress of selection...As I mentioned before, I did this because I wanna sh0w to "u" wh0 dumbed me that I can be very much successful than "u" can imagine.."u" g0nna regret this and I swear I will be so much successful in my career...I swear..!!!..Just wait and see..One day...A bit more time to go..

Then after all the hard work today, I went straight back to my room, lying d0wn with d only pants on and have a good day sleep...Damned, what a lucky day.....Grateful...



just me:

rAy jR...@...Aliff

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Temporary CrAp..





"A minute thought about you
vanishes all my happiness for the d day"




just me:

rAy jR...@....Aliff

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Paparatzi......



Title : Part-time Paparazzi
Location : Anywhere & everywhere
Photographer : rAy jR....@.....Aliff

Description :

"Always chasing us"....A sentenced often used by the celebrity...yeah2, that's what makes them famous isn't it..or whatever....S0 don't always blame d media..

The point is, takin' photo is part of my j0b n0w..g0in' around and snap faces by faces...and I enjoyed it..




"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice,
it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."
- Winston Churchill-




*p/s:~Oceanus, did u just make ur blog private?..c0z i could n0t view ur bLog..(dissappointed)




just me:

rAy jR....@....Aliff

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Drag me....


"Lalalala"....I like that word so much...I d0nno why... maybe because it does makes me happy last time...oh dear...U know wat, since I get back here with my b0ring life, I couldn't think of anything interesting to do...

Everyday I would viewed my bl0g and then started to think of 0ne interesting topic to talk about..but I couldn't..I've tried to find any interesting part or event that going on lately or whatesoever..but i couldn't find one..wat a silly me...

Everyday is the same...weekdays (sleeping mode), weekend (night life)...etc2...Well, as Oceanus used to say, "you're just going through a hard time in your life"...But its been so long already right??and why I still couldn't forget it entirely??....Ahrghh...watever..

You know wat, I think it's time for me to fly in a different directions..To become more than i used to be....Well, I think for now I'll choose an aggressive social life.or whatever....To enjoy, to use, to be use and to be *******....Drag me to your life..I'm on....Well, 'u' make me like this....So don't blame me for I am socially contaminated..coz I just can't forget 'u'....s0 let it be..

Owh, my fren pai have modified my teka-teki..."macam mana nak makan nasi + kunyit, tapi rasa telur 3 rasa??".....hahaha...You can ask him if u wanna know d answer..hahaha...



just me :

rAy jR....@.....Aliff

Friday, October 16, 2009

Beautifool...



To forgive is the highest value that human ever did..but d0 we really meant it when we say "I forgive you"?..After all the bad things that people ever did to us, can we forgive them and forget everything about it just like that??


N0body's perfect..and anger is just a part of us..we need it s0metimes...But if we l0ve and appreciate s0me0ne very much, no matter h0w hurt we are when they did s0mething to us, we will always forgive them...We never blame them for anything..in fact, s0metimes we even blame ourself for not giving the best to them..


It's hurt from inside..but it is als0 beautiful because thats what makes us human...


*p/s~its been s0 long....is it u or is it n0t...

*I have to walk through the rain to post this entry..because d internet in my room are damned sl0w...oh dear...


just me :

rAy jR...@....Aliff

Monday, October 12, 2009

REcharge Party





Event : REcharge Party
Location : Swing, Kuantan
Members : rAy jR..@...Aliff & d geng

Description :

A madness... That's all I can say..Was held last saturday in Swing club, Kuantan..We went there at 10pm, registered ourselves for the entrance, get a free gifts and enjoyed till 3am...Well, eventhough the next day we have a softskill seminar (bengkel final year)....like i care..huh..

Btw we get 2 know dis 1 fellow, his name is far0Q..a "on stage recharge dancer"..Looking at the way he shuffled & moved around, goodness, u'll amazed...Then he asked me this 1 teka-teki... "macam mana nak makan nasi & kunyit, tapi rasa telur?"....U wouldn't wanna know d answer..haha.....anyway dude, u get my number already, so do keep in touch..see u on the next event...



just me :

rAy jR...@....Aliff

Friday, October 9, 2009

Storage





Title : 0Ld items
0wner : rAy jR...@....Aliff

Description :

Still remember all those stuffs when s0meone gave u and u still keep it...Yes I do..Letters, cards, presents, shirts, tie and everything...every week u received a letters, many types of...then u'll feel that u are hot and handsome or whatsoever..haha..

4 d rest of my life, I wont throw it away no matter how painful @ sweets the memories are...I love my very oLd collections of stuffs coz it reminds me of the past sometimes...I don't really remember numbers and figure, but I 'm not a type of a person who forget d memories so easily....No matter how hard it is for me, I will just keep it..Because, that's what makes me a person of milions of colorful experiences...


Today's Life :

- Undergo 2 tests today
- both are sucks..Aku xstudi, so xbleh jawab..
- Aku dh color balik rambut aku warna hitam..
- Mbazir duit bet0l..
- just me, aku buat ni tuk ko..
- xbsemangat aku sejak balik cni..
- No purpose...
- whatever happen, happen la..Like I care..
- Hujung mgu ni, i'm goin for a REcharge party..
- All I need is entertainment..whatever it takes..
- Coz what else u expect me to do?..kenangkan masa lalu?crying?..
- My fren recommended me to try 'K' (ketamin)..
- He said it's good 2 be free from depression..
- emm..ntah..tgkla nti..klw aku perlu...
- Xsabar aku nk smbut new year..coz 2009 is so much FCUK..
- It kn0ck me d0wn s0 badly...
- till I bec0me a societal addict...

*what a stupid & annoying confession...


just me :

rAy jR...@...Aliff

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Maen Shisha...


Event : Missed the flight
Location : International airport
Useless person : Me

Description :

Was supposed to go back yesterday at 4pm...Unfortunately, that was not the plan. I missed my flight. FCUK..!...Eventhough I still have 15 minutes before d departure, I couldn't get it...Idiot me...what a careless situation...The ticket were totally burned..Pekak telinga aku kena ceramah ngn ayah aku...He's really mad....Siap ckp "You are totally insane.!!..pening la ko nie"...He block my financial support already....Apa lah nasib...

Never mind..backing-off but doesn't mean back-d0wn...Kuar rumah, hang0ut, main shisha and evrtg...Missed flight?huh....Seriously?...that was a stupid mistake...too much..and i'm br0ke..


just me:
rAy jR...@...Aliff